TIME: How to Use It Wisely and Know When to Say No

Someone recently asked me, “What’s the most common reason people come to see you?

Without thinking twice, I rattled off, “They’re at odds with someone in their lives (living, dead… or both) and they want resolution.” They want to understand what guidance is trying to tell them, so they can act accordingly and stop second guessing themselves.

That’s what they say out loud.

Inside their heart, they want to be free to change their mind. They want to remove their doubt or shame because they’re tired of feeling lost.


That’s ultimately what they want and what I hope to provide; the ability to know what to do with every moment of our time here on Earth. Because really, that’s all we have.


When someone dies, we reflect on times they had with them and how they made us feel. When I speak to those on the other side, they reflect on how their time was spent with others. In both cases, there’s often regret.

They wish they would have:

  • Put down their cell phones more.
  • Said how they really felt.
  • Given attention those who matter most.

In our January group, our topic will be: TIME: How to Use It Wisely & Know When to Say No

With the holidays in full swing, consider this, “We actually harm others when we do things out of obligation.”

People often have agenda’s with us. It’s hard to recognize at first because we want to be open and kind. When this happens, we start playing out roles we think we have to play. We march to the beat of someone else’s drum and lose pace with our own.

It’s time for us to get clear about the TIME we put into things; how it’s spent and with whom? Who we chose to invest our time with is more important than ever. In the end, it’s all we have.

Having discernment is one thing. Yet in that discernment, we’re taught to make others wrong or to invoke drama in order to “get our way.” Carefully choosing our words and actions is skill each of us can sharpen.

You can always count on me to help you hone this skill because I practice it every day. And I believe ultimate happiness resides in those clear words and actions.

I also want to say, we’ve never been in a time where there’s so much distraction. Just a few years ago, we used clocks and watches to find the time.

Now, we’re given the option of checking emails, texts and Facebook while keeping track of the day. This ups our chances of separation from those we love. We can’t let technology widen the gap between hearts.

Let’s keep this conversation going.

Let’s keep this awareness growing.

Living a “no-regrets” life is worth it!

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WHAT BLOCKS US FROM OUR GUIDES: A Process for Reconnection

A time comes in nearly every relationship when we look at the other person and think, “Is this worth it? Should I really be spending my time with them?”

These are the situations where we long for connection with Spirit Guides. If only they could tell us which way to turn, life would be so much easier.

These situations can happen with our boss, friends, relatives, or intimate partner. In these interactions, we’re somehow inhibited from being our true selves… and we don’t know what to do about it.

Here’s the thing.

Until we learn the skill of going inside and sensing what’s real for us, first… we’ll never be able to hear, see, or feel guidance from Spirit.

Think of a conversation recently that didn’t meet your needs.

Perhaps you were with friends and the interaction turned superficial and caddy. Or your coworkers were acting excited in front of the boss, and you knew their enthusiasm was in genuine. Maybe your partner rejected something important to you and it triggered fury and shame.

When this happens, we often:

– shut down
– pull away
– become judgmental
– get angry or tired
– enter a state of loneliness.

This is when it’s important to sit back and ask, “Is this meeting a need for me? Is this meeting a need for the others?”

Now I want you to know… I am not a fan of formulas or quick fixes. But there’s the process I use for being present and moving through this kind discomfort.

Here’s how it looks for me:

1. I take a long, deep breath.

2. Give empathy and compassion to myself for the way I feel and ask for patience.

3. Look to see if others are being fed by the conversation and I may even ask them, “How is this serving a need for you?”

4. Then I listen closely and explore with my heart, “What’s alive for me now?”

5. Having gained this knowledge, I’ll then ask permission, “Are you open to hearing what’s happening for me?”

6. If the answer is no, I stop. If yes, I speak (in first person) about how I feel.

Authentic communication gives us a choice. We can engage or disengage. Let’s hone these truth-telling skills together and let Spirit know, we’re doing our end of the work.

This tells them we’re fully open and available to receive their blessing.

With this desire and commitment, we’re sure to find the authentic relationships we seek with ourselves, each other, and our Beloved guides.

As always, if I can help you in this reconnection, it would be my pleasure. ** Reach out to me www.spirit-medium.net for phone and in-person sessions.

Much love to you,

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Rise and Shine a wake up call like no other.

Last night, I surrendered my schedule to spirit. Being asked to do more, I see that with productive use of my time I can in fact do what my guides are asking me to do.

My best time is 4:30 a.m. to rise, and resting by 9 p.m. In the past, I have fought this. Who wants to go to bed that early? Most nights I’m not even home by then, let alone ready to rest. Can you relate? We know what we need to do, but just don’t want to do it.

Last night in deep surrender letting it go, I gave in and said, “OK, do what you must and I will follow the plan.” This is how my dialogue with my higher self/spirit/ guides goes. Not quite in full surrender, I compromise and set my alarm clock for 5:30 a.m.

Maybe you can guess what happens next? I am in fact awakened at 4:30 a.m.!

For many reasons I have always kept a large glass of water on the window sill behind my bed, usually 32 ounces—a nighttime ritual. I have cats so it is a small miracle that what happens next has never happened before. Last night, the window had accumulated four glasses of water, and one glass of juice. So by now…you guessed it, WHAM! I feel this huge splash on my head and jump out of bed. The blinds are literally clinking as if to say, “It was us. You asked for a wake-up call at 4:30.” I start laughing “ok, ok, and ok!”

Looking around the room, I see that nothing else on my bed is wet except me and the spot I’m sleeping on. My laptop and phone reside next to me on my spacious California King sized bed, and not a drop of water on them.

There is no wind, only that one huge gust-of-a “wake up call.” Outside, not even a stir of a breeze anywhere. A statue in the window is unharmed, but not one beverage glass remains. They somehow flew over me from their perch, drenching me in water before landing on the floor beside me. As for the juice glass, it merely slid down the wall and landed upright, fully intact.

Nothing is logical about this but I search for answers anyway, all the while saying aloud, “I get it, I get it!”  I’m in awe and appreciate the very skillful precision of this event. My heart starts to fill with gratitude that I am living this life and walking this path…wet but grateful, ever grateful for it all.


Note:  Not a pic of my “real” bed but its awesome all the same.

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Door Bell Ministries

Opening the door I felt the tightness in my chest and the awareness of my choices. For today this is what I chose to say to the women at my door.  “ I’m guessing you care about the world and want to ease the suffering and pain you see?” I’m guessing that this book you hold has brought you great comfort and that you want to share it with me? Please know that I receive you in the highest light and thank you for your intentions. I honor your path and ask that your God give you strength to do as you feel you must.”  In doing so, I was freed from the resentment I often experience from those “I think” would judge me. I received her intended love and thereby connected to my own.

Blessed be and so it is……

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